the day he passed away ...

a mid-summer day came with hails and chilling winds ...
i wanted to cry but oozing out a drop of tear seemed to be the hardest job ...
perhaps i was relieved that those eyes of his that showed no joy or sparks in the last year finally got to rest ...
i suddenly realized HE was my childhood ...
memories of him teaching me how to gamble at the age of 4, or how to fight an enemy by poking him in he eyes with your 2 fingers, fondled back, not with sadness, but rather a soothing drop of melancholy ...
he was always an easy man, never complained or asked for anything ...
everything he had, he gave all away, because he believed you should leave life the same way you came to life, with nothing ...
i still remember his smile whenever i scrubbed his back or brought food to his room, and those stares of lost hopes when i said goodbye, to leave himin that humid lonely room ...
i guess i was rather cruel, afterall i was one of the very few he could remember and identify after all the memory loss ...
sometimes i wish i was religious, then at least i could still believe he was here with me, or up there in heaven watching me ...
mum said he went away in peace, and i'm sure he did ...
in fact he was always at peace, to me he WAS peace ...
the day he passed away ...
was today ...

I love you grandpa ...

~Dee-Ha~